Misfit Founders
Misfit Founders
Sophia Lorimer on Sustainable Styling and Empowering Women
Join us in an inspiring conversation with Sophia Lorimer, a sustainable stylist dedicated to empowering women through mindful fashion. Sophia shares her journey of overcoming personal challenges and her mission to help women feel confident in their own skin. Learn how sustainable style can transform both your wardrobe and mindset.
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Sophia, thank you for joining me. You asked me if I know what you do and I kind of said, well, it's something around styling for women. My audience knows that I don't dig deep into my guests. You drove it was like a 20-minute.
Speaker 1:No, yeah, 20 minutes drive here, yeah, yeah there or all there about so I appreciate that there's a gift at the end of the podcast for you, just as a just as a reward, and uh, you didn't know about that. No, I didn't know about that. Should we start with a quick introduction, um, maybe a couple of words of what is it that you do currently your business, and then we'll get into how you got into this and everything else.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so I am a sustainable stylist. I empower women to dress for success sustainably. And you're probably thinking what on earth is that?
Speaker 1:That was my first question.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so it's really getting women to feel amazing in what they wear. That is already in circulation, so it could be a case of you know, you just don't know what to wear within your wardrobe. I help inspire and empower you to really take your style and amplify it so it can not only make you feel amazing, but it can also open lots of doors for you, because when the way that we feel in our clothes has such a huge impact on our lives and the way that we feel, so kind of like renewing your wardrobe without renewing your wardrobe yeah, and renewing your mindset as
Speaker 3:well, because a lot of. There's so many things that stop us, but one of the main main things is our mindset and how we see ourselves, and you know the the on cycle of things that go on in our minds I'm too big, I'm too thin, I'm too old, I'm too this, and I really help empower women to let go of that and that treadmill of thought and really step into your own and love the woman that you are my follow-up question is why specifically women like, why not also men dudes?
Speaker 3:yeah, no, and I get that all the time from many, many men. The thing is that I started my business because of some really bad trauma that I went through and I can empathize fully with what women go through through different chapters of our lives, whether it's hormonal, monthly, whether it's menopause, all of these things childbirth, all of these things change us as women, and I can. I've lived through a lot of it. I know what happens to our bodies and therefore I can help women going through some of those trickiest stages in their lives or different chapters in their lives where, with men, I I'm not, I'm not there, I can't. Everything that I do is from a really passionate and um, thought out place where, with men, I don't get the same enthusiasm or the same passion, and I think that we should do things from that point of view right so it's, it's that relatability factor as well.
Speaker 1:I completely agree and in general, I think this is more emphasized than some of my other examples, because you know, you have your own experiences and live through certain things, so you probably can help um women more than men. Yeah, you, you know. You haven't lived in one skin. Well, maybe in a different life, I don't know um, no, yeah, no yeah but, um, it's the same.
Speaker 1:I feel that it's the same for me every single time I've tried to do something that I wasn't passionate about or cared deeply about, and do it just for the money, in a sense, I've done a sloppy job or I just gave up's a very wise choice, because I think we also sometimes give on to pressure. Yeah, so like if you're doing something that's really good and you're passionate about it and you love it, and you start getting requests of, oh, but you know, my husband needs this, and the amount of times I get that when I work with my clients and I get in their home, they're like, oh, can you do my husband?
Speaker 3:And I'm like no. And they're like, oh, but you know we'll pay and all of this. And I'm like no because to me, it's not just about the money, it's really I want to empower women and that's where my, that is where my expertise or my what is it called? And they call it something of genius, um, my point of genius. It's called a proper saying, but I've forgotten what it's called. But, yeah, that is where my, my lane is, and there's somebody else that can do men, so you need to go with them.
Speaker 1:but I think that focusing on something that you're good at is the best way and that you're passionate at yeah, and it's, it's, um, it's a mistake that a lot of people do just um, just kind of like giving on to the pressures of, or thought thinking of well, you know, actually this might be an opportunity. And then I'll realize, well, I went down a path that I'm not happy with yeah absolutely.
Speaker 1:How does it work right? So how, maybe tell me a bit about the process. So someone, okay, and maybe let's start from the the most common challenge that, um, your customers come knocking at your door with, like what is the? Well, you know, I'm not happy in my own body clothes, um, I'm not happy with the style I don't identify with. What are some of the most common challenge?
Speaker 3:the most common one is weight. Um, as women, our weight fluctuates depending on whatever we've got going on in our lives. Um, I had, and I still do have, a huge influx of women that come to me because their bodies changed over, covid um and the things that they used to wear. Or it's the case of the things that they used to wear, they're now not wearing in the office because their bodies have changed, but they don't know how to dress now in the office. Or women that want um new brand identity within their brands and things like that, because all of that really matters.
Speaker 3:So it is a combination of quite a few things, but primarily, the underlining factor is about weight and how they feel and how they see their body. Um, and the way that I work is that we're not gonna you know I'm not gonna make you look 10 years younger, but what I can do yeah sorry, but what I can do is get you to love the woman that is looking back at you in the mirror, and all of that doesn't happen overnight. Again, I don, I don't have a magic wand, unfortunately, but it's a process that we go through that really helps you to get a new pathway in all the conditioning that we've had throughout all of our lives, that you've got to be a size eight to be beautiful, or you've got to be a certain weight, to wear certain things, but just for you to take your power back and to feel confident and comfortable in your own skin. So I really work with women about mindset. A lot of my work's to do with mindset how you see yourself and all of that. And then it's really you taking the power back.
Speaker 3:And what do you love? Not what your husband loves you in, not what Auntie Sandra that's always seen you in and loves you in. But what do you love? Not what your husband loves you in, not what auntie sandra that's always seen you in and loves you in, but really what you love, because a lot of the times as well, that lots of people don't know yeah they're like oh I, you want to ask me what I love, what I just love the things that are on trend or what everyone else is wearing and it's so, so common.
Speaker 3:Yet you look like everybody else.
Speaker 3:You are not authentically yourself, you are not aligned to wearing your values.
Speaker 3:It's that whole thing of I get so many women, like you know, I'm all up for women's rights and I'm all this, I'm all this, but I'm like but if you're saying that, but you're then going to shop from brands or people that are paying their workers like 3p per item, that's and those people are majority of them are women you're not wearing your values. So it's really about it's so much more than just putting somebody in a lovely frock. It is so much bigger than that, and that's why I'm so passionate about what I do is because it's a whole full circle, because it's not just about you that I work with. It's also about how you then go on to where your values and where you, you know, vote with your money, so to speak. And, with that being said, anything that you've got in your wardrobe that is not right for you, that doesn't align with your values or the woman that you want to be. I help you sell it on in pop up shops or donate it to women's shelters or the homeless.
Speaker 1:So it's a really circular of goodness I like to call it well, and this is one of the things that I was assuming that's happening, because it's more than, as you say, just hey, chuck this on and voila, magically, now you feel better about yourself, right? Not lengthy process of getting to the core of that individual's individuality and likings and mindset and and figuring out what they, where they want to be, and working with them. So it's a mindset exercise, not just here's the clothes that will work for you the clothes are the cherry on the top.
Speaker 3:It's really about that. It's so funny. This morning I had a connection call, so that's where it all starts with a connection call, and I offer my connection calls totally free, because there's nothing more exposing and vulnerable than a stranger talking to you about your body, your weight, your wardrobe, your clothes all of these things and I just think that you need to have that lovely connection with somebody before you part with your money.
Speaker 3:So I think that. So I always offer that for free, and it's funny. I had a connection call with a lady this morning and she was like I cannot believe I've never thought to ask myself these questions, that that. So initially, I have the, I have a questionnaire that I send out before the connection call and she was like it enlightened me so. So much just giving myself the time to ask myself these questions. How do I really feel like? What are my favorite features of my body? So many people don't even know that. So how can you dress your body in things that you love and that make you feel good if you don't even know what you love about your body?
Speaker 1:you know it's, so do people find it hard to answer that question absolutely, absolutely.
Speaker 3:That's why I caveat it and say, if you cannot think of it, what would your best friend say about you? And that helps sometimes. But sometimes you get people that put, I don't know, yeah, and that's really sad, it's really sad. So I think that for me it's about the whole journey. It's not just about the end result, it's about helping them to feel that okay. So I put on this form. I really love my legs. What can I wear that makes my legs, you know, show off my legs a bit more? Or, you know, show off my eyes. It doesn't have to be or like. I had a lady that said that I really like my dimples when I smile and I was like that is gorgeous. So maybe smiling more is going to be huge for you, because you're going to be able to see that more and it's all these little things that we take for granted that's awesome.
Speaker 1:I'm curious how much time does it usually take this journey with with a customer to a point where they're like you know you've, you've massively helped me, I feel more confident in myself and my wardrobe and how I present myself to the world, like how, how much time does that process usually take?
Speaker 3:it's from the connection call to the, even the aftercare. It's probably about 10 weeks right, yeah, 10 weeks yeah, but it's not 10 weeks of me like at you or anything like that yeah the.
Speaker 3:You know the day that we spend together, um, so we have the connection call, we have a bit of back and forth for me to create you a mood board to have your like style as you want it. So you sort of have a visual aspect of exactly what you want, um, and how you want to feel in your clothes. What textures do you like, what colors do you like? All of that kind of thing, um, so yeah, that's a bit of a maybe a two week process in between there and then on the day, I come to your house for up to about six hours, depending on how big your wardrobe is, and then afterwards after that, then we have the aftercare. That's about eight weeks after that and the aftercare is more so.
Speaker 3:So we can go through anything that you know we might have missed, or anything that, any add-ons that you might need or anything that you've forgotten from the day. You know all of that you have I call it stylist in your pocket where you can um, if something comes up, let's say that we didn't address on the day. You've got that time to mull it over and you've got me for that time, and you know for me personally, that time is really sacred for my clients, because I really want to make sure that you're okay moving forward to put everything that we put into practice oh yeah, because I mean, even if, even if you this is one of the things that some service providers don't understand Even if you don't care about your customer success, post your service offering, you should care, because that might come back to bite you right?
Speaker 1:So, like I've seen so many examples of because I'm coming from the software world, of consultancies and agencies, coming in doing a bunch of work and then not picking up the phone call after the project is over and not being employed ever with that customer or that customer's network, because of that, yeah, absolutely, and do you know what?
Speaker 3:that took me a long time to grasp myself. I'm not going to sit here and say that I've always done it. It is something that, um, I've been doing for the last two and a bit years, but at the start I was exactly that person. I didn't do the follow-ups, I just had them, and then I was like, ok, bye, and that was it, and that they're my, that's my gold. You know, they've had me, they're my point of my marketing, all of that stuff. And also I'm very much even my first ever client. I'm still very close with her to this day because, because I, you grow very fond of these people and for me I'm just like I just want to see them really succeed and I love to know what that, what's happening.
Speaker 3:I feel like you're becoming their BFF for for a period, right, absolutely oh, there's some that we're like absolutely great, great friends, like to this day we go out for dinners.
Speaker 1:Our kids have met, yeah well, I mean it, you know.
Speaker 1:I feel that that I would be in the same both um with you, right, if you would have been styling that um because I I think I'm also a bit of as I um to nikki like I, I care quite a lot about, um, my image, my, my public image. I want to dress up, I want to. You know, when I get compliments of, oh I like that shirt, oh I like this, that it makes me feel really good and and and. It's not because I need that validation from people, it's because it adds to the trust in a sense in me. Right, it's like oh, you know, I like this, I'm putting this together. Oh, I put an effort into figuring out this thing or this wardrobe or this, whatever style. Um, oh, okay, yeah, that works. Yeah, that's awesome.
Speaker 1:Um, it's like the cherry on the top yeah, exactly, yeah, yeah it gives you that final like yeah, I know because you also mentioned earlier about, um, the fact that a lot of your customers, or part of your customers, um, the original wardrobe is, you know, stuff that they see on tv, or styles or this or that, and I used to do that quite a lot when I was younger, but I don't know. Nowadays I feel like I'm 37, so when I go into a shop or when I go looking for something new, it's just something that that shocks me about. You know, a t-shirt or something like that, so and and that I get it. Yeah, right, and as a testament to that we were, I was talking to to Nikki the other day because I just got my hair, um, dyed blonde and she was like, what color was it?
Speaker 3:but it was brown, wasn't it?
Speaker 1:yeah, yeah and she was like, well, probably middle age, um, um, drama, um. And she was like, oh, you need to change your wardrobe now because your wardrobe is a bit too serious for for the hair. And I'm like, hell, no, I'm not just going to. Oh, because you know, all the blondes, dyed blondes out there, dudes, wear pink t-shirts.
Speaker 1:So I don't have a couple of pink t-shirts, but I, I like, I like my clothing yeah and if I like, it doesn't really matter if someone, someone says well, that hairdo with that outfit doesn't work no, I like it I feel good in it and that is what it's all about, and I love that that.
Speaker 3:We need more of that, because not many people see it from that point of view. They're like, oh, what are the people gonna think? That's what stops them from wearing the things that they love and enjoy? Wearing it's other people's opinion or comparison. You know, that's not what everybody else is wearing, so I couldn't. You know. No one else is dyeing their hair blonde, so I won't do the thing and I'm just like if it makes you feel authentically you and you love it, do it because it's gonna.
Speaker 1:It's gonna hit differently yeah, and, like you, you mentioned you um, hit the nail on the head um earlier, with the cherry on top. It's for me is if, like, I feel good with something, if someone validates it, I'm like yeah, oh, that's awesome. If someone says oh, that that doesn't work really well, I'm like, so what I like? It yeah, it's like I'm the primary stakeholder in in this situation I love that, absolutely, absolutely.
Speaker 3:And most of the time we give our power away to other people. Yeah, um, like they've got the rights. Like you know, they bought my wardrobe, so I need to adhere to what they say, and it doesn't work like that the going back to kind of like follow-ups and such, in a way.
Speaker 1:I also understand it because I I used to do um consultancy a while back, um and freelancing and such, and the most painful thing is when, when someone pays you for for a service, for for a project, and the project is done, but yet they keep on coming and requiring more of your time, unpaid, just because, oh, let's polish this, oh, can we publish this, oh, can we do this, and that's that's time consuming and frustrating. So in a way, yes, but I like the fact that you're actually charging, right, so like in your packages, right, so I'm gonna put this together. And then you have a period of you know calls like what would you call it?
Speaker 3:stylist on um stylist in your pocket. Stylist in your pocket.
Speaker 1:I love that, so I I feel that you found the, the the kind of like recipe there.
Speaker 3:Yeah the sweet spot, because it's also the different packages, don't that? I've got different packages and only two of them have that. So if you know that you're that kind of person that needs that, we can tailor make and have that as well. So for me it's bespoke to what your needs are. You don't have to go for it if you don't need it, but it's definitely there if you do.
Speaker 1:You mentioned about the fact that you're still good friends with your first customer. Do you remember that first service that you provided? When was that? How, how long ago was that?
Speaker 3:um, so it was in november. It was in november before covid was my first ever client um in person. I say client. I'd had one bus before, but they don't, they didn't really count.
Speaker 3:This is my first official right, yeah, as a business, as a business, um, yeah, not just playing shops, basically, um, and I remember it like it was yesterday, because I was so nervous, um, I was so nervous actually, I forgot to take before photos of the wardrobe and that's something that I always do and I was just like, oh my gosh, the imposter syndrome kicked in hard. I was like, am I doing a good enough job? I kept on questioning myself so many things were going on in my head, um, throughout the whole session and I don't think I let on that. So many things were going on in my head because she had an amazing experience. To this day, she says that that whole experience was life-changing.
Speaker 1:I was gonna ask that was that would have been my question whether you feel like that was that that had an impact on your output and the basically how you worked with the customer because, and I think more people need to hear this. We're so, we're all so strict, like even when I started and done my first podcast, it was was a year ago, right. Yeah.
Speaker 1:And I've done all my podcasts in person. So this was a new experience for me. I've done stuff online content and such and I was so stressed about it and I just thought that I should probably throw away that first podcast and never publish it. But the reality is that people don't really. You know it. That's the, that's the baseline, right? You're starting there. Yeah, your first customer will have a great experience anyways, because you know what you're talking about. Yeah, um, and then from then, then onwards, you can only go upwards, right, absolutely, because we're all our biggest critics, right? And then you know, oh, I've kind of like stumbled here in that the customer has no idea, right, but I know. So next time I need to do better. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Do you feel like you've evolved your style of working with customers over the years?
Speaker 3:Oh, goodness me, I've evolved from last year and I think that, being a business owner, if you don't have that evolution, then your business is not going to grow, and I do so much.
Speaker 3:I'm so hot on my feedback, whether it's an event that I've done, whether it's whatever, I always want feedback because that's the only way that I can grow, and there was things that she was just so lovely in her feedback, but there was still things that I knew that I could have done better on. So for me it was like analysing myself, not from a point of criticism, but where I could really amplify my message better. You know my aftercare, all so many things have changed, and every year I look at how my business model, like how I my whole transaction with my clients, to see how I can tweak it, make it better and make it time efficient for me as well, you know, because time is our greatest asset and I want to make sure that I'm doing the right steps to move my business forward for sure you, you're, you're mentioning that before this first official client right, you've done a bit of um, a bit of work before that.
Speaker 1:How did you get into this? How have you always been interested in, in style and personal styling, or how?
Speaker 3:did you get? To to this business well, how long have you got?
Speaker 3:um so I've always been into fashion. Fashion was always part of my upbringing. I've always always been into it, but it sort of took a bit of a crazy turn. But let me start from the beginning. So I'm from a huge, huge family, one of 10. 34 or 36, is it now? I think it's 34 nieces and nephews. 34 or 36 is it now? I think it's 34 nieces and nephews. So huge, huge family. I grew up in a household that was chaotic, like crazy, crazy chaotic, and when I was about nine or ten, I had I shared a bedroom with two of my sisters and there was this understairs cupboard that was just like a junk cupboard. We all have one right um, just full of all this stuff, the hoover, all this stuff and I was just like I'm gonna gut it out. I'm gonna gut it out and make it my own, making my own place. So I did just that I gutted it out, um, painted it with some old paint that I found in there and made it into my own how old, were you about nine or nine?
Speaker 3:yeah, and I gutted it and I painted it.
Speaker 3:I put all Spice Girls posters up, of course, and boyzone, you know all the things NSYNC and really made it my little haven and I moved all my clothes, everything I owned, into this little understairs cupboard and I placed all my clothes neatly in colour order, hooked them up. So I just like I literally got nails and I was just banging them into the wall, into the pure concrete wall, and just hung up all my clothes all nicely, got a little rack for my shoes and just made it all really, really nice, all my accessories, all laid out beautifully. And I kid you not, this place was like my heaven, like I go in there, and I just felt amazing, it was like my place.
Speaker 1:You made it, you built it.
Speaker 3:I made it, yeah, and it was funny because I always talk about this story and I think that's when the seed was sown for me to bring me to what I do today, because that feeling of having that space just for me where I could see everything I've got I didn't have to look here, there and everywhere for my stuff it just made me so much more happier and then fast forward to well also, and I had didn't have didn't have hand me downs, I had like fourth me downs because I was like one of the youngest so I.
Speaker 3:It just trickled down to me eventually how many siblings do you um?
Speaker 1:there's 10 of us. Oh, 10, 10 siblings, yeah, so there's 10 of us, there's nine of us and I'm the 10th um, and I've got two brothers and the rest are girls right, right, I got it because initially I thought that, um, when you said 10, I thought that your parents, for some reason, like there was 10 um in the family, and then nieces and no, no, so it was 10.
Speaker 3:Just siblings, your siblings, yeah um, yeah, so it's a bit crazy. And then so, yeah, I had loads of hand-me-downs. We were a huge family, so it's car boot sales, charity shops, that's where we got our clothes from. And then when I started working, I was like, well, I'm not going to have any of that, I'm going to go and buy all the latest stuff and be like my friends so fast. Fashion was just my magnet to me because I was getting hardly paid anything working in retail, so it was just all going straight back out and I was just buying everything and anything so I could fit in and be like my friends, that could afford all these nice things. And for a long time I didn't know what I really loved, and this goes back to exactly what I do now. I want you to love what you, what you really love, and do that instead of being on this treadmill of, well, that's what everyone else is wearing or that that's what makes money, that yeah absolutely so.
Speaker 3:Um yeah, so for years and years I just wore the things because that's what everyone else was wearing. I tried to be a bit quirky here and there and it might not have landed well, so I just went back to well, like, oh gosh, I tried lots of things. I had my hair every colour you could possibly imagine, and by landed.
Speaker 1:Well, what do you mean by that?
Speaker 3:you didn't like it no, just like comments that I would get from other people oh, so you're at a stage where you cared um about about other people.
Speaker 3:Validation, this is it and this is it, and for a long time I just I just wanted to fit in at this time. Um, there wasn't that many people that looked like me. Um, where I grew up, there was literally when I came to england when I was six. It was me, my cousins were, and another family were mainly the only black people around my area so you're in a white neighborhood, a white neighborhood, so fitting in was crucial.
Speaker 3:I used to have my hair braided and kids would call me medusa at school. This is the kind of place where I used to yeah, absolutely how, how long was this?
Speaker 1:well, what so?
Speaker 3:I was, I was. I came here when I was six, so, and now I'm 38, so maths was not my thing.
Speaker 1:So so you're 38. I'm 38, the same age age as me. So yeah this is like in the 90s yeah, yeah that you're growing up and you're getting this kind of yeah, absolutely do you think things have improved since then?
Speaker 1:because I, I don't know. I don't know if I should blame it on the. You know well, it was 90s and people, and especially kids in schools and so on, were a bit more rough, unpolished and uneducated and 100% uneducated, and that's what it was, because there wasn't many people that looked like me, so they were like what I?
Speaker 3:we don't know where to place you kind of thing right and so for me, I just had to try and fit in anywhere possible, and for me that came for fashion. So I just tried to emulate what everybody else was wearing, what all the cool kids were wearing, what I saw on in magazines back in the day it was a magazine, not social media. So, yeah, and that's literally what I did for many, many, many years until it all came to on its head when I had my daughter, and everything changed. Everything changed because I, I lost myself. I lost all the confidence I thought I had. I got this whole new body overnight, these boobs that came from nowhere, that I didn't know what to do with, and I was just like I don't know what to do with this new baby, this body.
Speaker 3:I feel like I've lost myself, this version of myself that I thought I knew really well. Um and but more to the point, I didn't lose myself. I was actually finding myself for the first time and really getting to know who I was and what I loved and what I liked on my body. But it transpired that I got diagnosed with postnatal depression and it was just a really really dark time, really really dark time, really really dark time. But when I got better after a lot of therapy and a lot of work, I was like there must be other women that feel like this. There must be other women that go through something in their lives that takes them off course and makes them feel like they don't have control anymore and you open the Pandora's box isn't it because I feel that that's probably everyone like.
Speaker 1:I don't think they're like everyone and you know, and I don't know if if men I think men are maybe not that much in a sense of yeah, men go through a lot of stuff as well but it just feels like men just throw a rag on them and and and they don't care that much about you know how do I look and so on.
Speaker 1:But in in the world of, um, you know, women wear and stuff like I feel that that's everyone, right. That goes through a chunk, a period of time and then you kind of lose, yeah, your identity in terms of fashion and even if it's age, right, oh my, all of a sudden you realize I'm 40, my wardrobe is a bit, has become a bit like, neutral because I'm transitioning to a different state, it's age, it's menopause, it's having a baby, it's divorce, bereavement all of these things bring up different things for us and different chapters in our lives.
Speaker 3:It's okay for your wardrobe to change with you, not to be a hindrance or hold you back, because a lot of the times oh the amount of clients I've had and they're like, uh no, I need to hold on to that, because one day I'm going to be a size 10 again, but this one day you're size 10 like five, six years ago, and you're still not a size 10.
Speaker 1:So letting that sad pile go is going to only empower you to move forward with the body that you're in now and it's so hard like it, and I'm because, because I'm a, I'm kind of like a, um, I would say, clothing junkie, like all of those um closets, wardrobes and behind you are, are just piled with my clothes and and nikki is telling me like you need to stop buying clothes because there's, we don't have where to place them and sometimes we don't, we do holes, like um letting go holes nice and I find it so difficult to to let go of things.
Speaker 1:She goes like do you still use this polo? I haven't used it in six months but I'm maybe one day I'm gonna still use it. So I I understand that. Is that a challenge that you have with customers?
Speaker 3:Oh, a hundred percent the letting go. You've got the memories, you've got the what if I do fit back into it and I need it. There's so, so many things that are tied up in our clothes, so so many emotions, and that's why I trade really carefully with my clients and I come up with new ways. Like, let's say, you've got something. I had a client that had a. It was a t-shirt. She wore it on her first date with her husband. She's been with her husband for 20 years or something like that, so they're married and everything, but she still had this t-shirt that she wore on their first date. She didn't want to get rid of it. It doesn't fit her anymore, her anymore. It's just there, still hanging in her wardrobe with the rest of her clothes, just, you know, gathering up dust, and I was like, okay, this doesn't need to be in your wardrobe frame it, put it on the wall absolutely, absolutely.
Speaker 3:Or I said to her why don't you let somebody else enjoy it? Give it. It was like a band tea. It's like see if your son wants to wear it, lo and behold, loves it, wears it all the time, and then you can see it transpire. If it is something that you absolutely love, see, if it's a fabric, let's say, get it made into a cushion cover, because then you can enjoy every day rather than having stuff.
Speaker 3:Because another point about physical clutter it's not just physical clutter, it's also mental clutter, because it's not only wasting your physical space, but it's also wasting your time, because if you're trying to look for something that you want to wear every morning and you're going like this with elbows and all the things trying to get to what you actually want. That's taking up most of your time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, but I have a system now OK. He's defending it. Now I have basically the good stuff that you know I usually go out with, and then the stuff that I wear at home, that I just grab whatever, whatever it is. So that's a big, that's a bigger pile. I'm not doing, I'm not doing myself any favours.
Speaker 3:Also, can we just quickly tackle the good stuff? What do you mean by the good stuff?
Speaker 1:I mean the stuff that I go out with and use for my content, my podcast and things like that.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 1:And then I have stuff that's more comfortable, that is just like stuff from home, like T-shirts and sweatpants and things like that, so I would then describe that the good stuff is like the stuff that you say for best. Yeah yeah, I'll give you another example.
Speaker 3:So like, for example, we have two dogs right like I do not wear some this, this clothes that I usually do the podcast or go out or um, what not that much in the house, sitting on the couches with all the dog hair and all of that stuff, where the rest of my clothes can be just piled with dog hair and yeah yeah, no, and I get that to a degree, but I'm always saying that every single day that we're on this side of the planet is our best day and we should dress for it, because the moments of every day are far greater than your best days where you're saving those clothes for best, and I think that we can all make pockets of moments throughout our week or our days where we can dress our best oh yeah, I've, I make reasons all the time to to dress up and even if I go to asda, I'll be like put my, my nice jeans on.
Speaker 1:Put my watch on. Yeah, dress up and go to the shop. No, I do that all the time amazing if I, if I don't, if I have a period where I'm like too, um, spend too much time in my sweatpants and and baggy t-shirts and so on, I'm just like I don't feel good. Yeah, like I feel like me. Dressing up makes me feel good about myself.
Speaker 3:Absolutely, absolutely. I feel like you're more productive, especially like for the things that you do and I do. I feel like when you're in that space or you're a business owner or anything like that, when you are dressed your best and you feel confident and more um open, you are more open to opportunities because you're going to talk to people that you might not have spoken to. But when you're not wearing your best, you know you could be an asda and strike a conversation with somebody about this podcast, and if you're wearing your best clothes, you're more likely to be like oh yeah, you know all of this, but you might be like, oh god, if somebody's seen you when you're not wearing your best things, and I think that it definitely has an impact on how we show up when you do wear your best it is yeah, and, and I think that it's, it's a two.
Speaker 1:For me it's a two-dimensional thing. On one side is one side is when you're showing up into a room dressed a certain way. There's this shallow world that we live in, where people notice, but the other dimension is like if you go into a room where you're extremely confident, right.
Speaker 1:If you go into a room where you're extremely confident and people that are confident, naturally they can wear a rag on and they're naturally confident and that shows it, captivates people. You get a certain level of acknowledgement from people, even if you're wearing, like I don't know, a baggy ripped T-shirt on and so on. Presenting and and being dressed the way that makes me feel confident, um helps me present myself as confident and helps those conversations. So I'm not the type of person that will enter a room wherever like all uh messed up and just walked out, woke up and looking like um hangover and be confident and uh kind of like have amazing conversations. I can't no.
Speaker 1:That's why, when I go, out, for example, with the dogs and my baggy stuff, home stuff. I'm like I don't walk tall and confident and such. I don't know it's just me.
Speaker 3:But maybe it's the wrong attitude. I see that so so often, so many people go into that narrative or that they don't want to be seen because they're lacking confidence, because of their, their weight or whatever. So they're aware things that will not attract any attention. But I'm like, how are you going to grow your business if you don't want to attract any attention?
Speaker 1:yeah it's like you know there's got to be a, there's got to be a ground that you need to um set, that you are going to be in a position to be seen and heard, to better yourself and open those doors of opportunity and I must say I'm really glad we're having this conversation because I feel that amongst a lot of the people that I know friends, acquaintances, people in business partners, communities and so on I'm a bit of an outcast and people don't understand my liking of style and dressing up and so on. So I'm happy we're having this conversation because I don't have it very, very often around style and dressing up and so on.
Speaker 3:So I'm happy we're having this conversation because I don't have it very very often around style and so and the thing is that people don't have to get it yeah.
Speaker 3:I think people don't have to get it, but I think that in different, in a different context, people do have to get it. If you're a business owner and it's your brand, I think that that's really, really important. But, in terms of like, if you like certain colors or whatever, or textures, or you like to put certain things together, people don't have to get that. Yeah, um, but it's how you carry yourself. That is the biggest factor. And, like we said about confidence, you are going to feel more confident and yet and all of that confidence builds up to, I don't care what anyone else thinks exactly, yeah, yeah, I wanted to ask you going back to so you had this moment where this transitional transition moment, that was also quite pivotal pivotal for you is that there must be other people that have gone through this stage or at this stage.
Speaker 1:How did you get from that thought to deciding to be a personal stylist for this segment?
Speaker 3:yeah, it was. I don't know what happened, because I went from literally rock bottom and then I was like I'm going to do something about it. I don't know anyone else that does this. I want to do something about it, I want to help those women, and it didn't happen overnight, believe me.
Speaker 3:I did a lot, a lot of work, um, where I was learning about um, first of all, because I really wanted to incorporate the fact that the sustainability factor, because I'd come from a shopping addiction through buying fast fashion to now having this baby that I was bringing into this world and I don't know what the world was going to look like after I was gone and I was contributing to that in such an awful way, but I didn't know what the impact was of my actions.
Speaker 3:So the really it really stemmed from the knowledge, and I always, always say it's like one of my biggest things, that I always say knowledge is power. Once I started unpicking and unravelling the impacts of fashion, I was like, no, there's so many people I know that don't know this. There's so many people out there that have no idea about this and I want to one, educate them to know about it and, two, to empower them to get off that hamster wheel that they've got to be like everybody else. So it came from a place of educating myself and then with the education came the confidence and came the empowerment of myself, and then I was like I've got to share it.
Speaker 1:And that was where it started and then I was like I've got to share it and that was where it started. Well, that that's an amazing, inspiring story, because I feel like that's that's where the good stuff comes from, like that's where the the really good founders and businesses are forged from self-discovery and wanting to, kind of like, express that and and empower and and enable others with the same type of tools.
Speaker 1:I think that's very effective. But you started you told me that you started like before the pandemic start started, and I feel like you've had this moment and you started doing this business and I suppose you were excited about it very. What talk to me about that period when everything started shutting down. How, how, how, how was that for you?
Speaker 3:it was tough. I'm not even going to sit here and say that, oh, it was all roses, because it wasn't. Um, it was tough. And also, just going back a little bit, that, um, when I started this, I don't have there's nobody in my family that has a business. My mum used to. My mum used to own a hairdresser back in Africa when I was little, but I vaguely remember that, um so, and I had no friends that had businesses, so I was literally going at it from a place of the unknown and total naivety that is so.
Speaker 1:And how did you how? How did you set up a business? How did you know how to do everything?
Speaker 3:I just, I just went online, I, I was determined, and the thing is that goes back to what I was saying before, because what I was doing was driven from a place of I want to help. It was purposeful and it was like I'd been through such an ordeal in my life and I was like I want to help those women. That was the driver. It was driven from such a place of oh my gosh, I want to do something and I'm going to do whatever it takes to do that thing. Yeah, so yeah. When COVID, so my first client on paper I always say was in the November, we then went into lockdown in the March, oh wow.
Speaker 1:So, literally like at the end of 2019, you officially started your business.
Speaker 3:Yeah. And then we went into lockdown in the March and at the time I was like no, it'll be fine, it'll be fine, it's only just a quick you know thing. It's fine, it's fine, like everyone else thought probably. And then it transpired that it wasn't going to be fine, that I'm not going to be able to go into clients wardrobes. At the beginning I'd set up my businesses that I'm going to go in clients wardrobes. It was never a thing of going online or anything like that. I was going to be face to face because that's where I I believe I thrive. Um, I'm very much of a energy people's person. So I was like no, it's fine, um, I'm just gonna have to go do it online. So I taught myself I spoke to so many people, I done so many dummy runs of doing my service online and I was like right, I'm gonna branch it online. And that was it. And I with me I'm very much it's a suck it and see, I'm just gonna give it a go. If it doesn't work, then we'll try again. And I've always been like that. Um, because I'm just like, if I don't try, I won't know.
Speaker 3:But equally, what I did was around that whole COVID time I amped up my learning. I joined so many forums, so many like. I think there was a time when I was on about five different things, whether it was manifesting money, business, women, founders there was so many things that I was getting knowledge from around that time. That really, really amplified my hunger to know that this is going to work, and there were so many people that I'm still very, very close to now that really helped me have that momentum that this is only this might seem like it's going to go on forever, but it really isn't. I need to be making these foundations now, and that is what I did in that time. Do you find that?
Speaker 1:from some of these communities did. Some of those connections also became customers of you yes yeah, I feel that that's one of the most underrated ways of connecting to people lead that become leads and become customers. It's like just being part of community learning communities, yes, and then you know, people get to know you and so you know you're you're the person that can help me with my wardrobe.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and they reach out to you and also that the people that were in these communities they were also like entrepreneurs and business owners. So they were too at that time like, oh, what's the future of my business? So I felt like we were all in it together. And then, obviously, when the time was right, some of them came back to me and became clients, because we all had a sort of shared common ground at that time. But, honestly, people really underestimate the power of networking and that connection to actual humans. Rather than just popping out a post every now and again like making those connections.
Speaker 3:Oh, honestly, I don't think my business will be here today if I hadn't um put myself out there in these networks and communities definitely but you do have a very specific character trait, which is the try right I need to give it a try, I need to try it right.
Speaker 1:I can't just, you know, I can't just let it fade away and so on, because I have people, acquaintances in my network that had brick and mortar businesses or in-person type of businesses that just closed up, and I was with some of them. I was trying to help them when say, well, maybe there's some digital version that you can do. Now, look like zoom is becoming very like zoom got.
Speaker 3:Didn't even know about zoom, yeah, and then it got well.
Speaker 1:I knew because I was working in this um software world and it was one of the kind of like corporate um conference call yeah uh, software that we were using.
Speaker 1:But just seeing zoom skyrocket over the pandemic was crazy. But yes, I was. I was kind of trying to suggest to people, but very reserved even when it, when it was making sense. So you know, I've had quite a few interactions where people were very resistant and reserved to trying to potentially do something, move um in a pivot in a way that makes sense for the times.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's like, oh well, no, it's, it's kind of like you at the beginning, oh, this is going to be short, or it's going to fade away to then, eventually you know hearing, or hearing from them or from other places, the other people, that, oh, they closed shop because, um, you know, this has been going on for two years and yeah, they have run out of runway and so on and I'm like, but you haven't even tried this other bit yeah, so I think that's a that's fundamentally a character trait that not everyone has.
Speaker 1:So you can you can be sitting and talking to a person saying this makes sense for your business, and if they're not the type that would have that character um trade to feature, to stray away from us, from something that's very unidimensional or safe, they're not going to look at it, they're not going to take it in consideration, even if they think that it's a great idea.
Speaker 3:Yeah, but it's too, it's too out of there.
Speaker 3:But I think that, as a business owner, or even if they think that it's a great idea, yeah, but it's too, it's too out of the but. I think that, as a business owner, or even if you're thinking about getting into business, you've got to have some kind of a, you've got to have a suck it and see attitude you. Otherwise, every time that you do something and it fails, then you're like, oh, I'm done, you're not going to get anywhere. There's so many things that I've tried in the past that have failed. I tried a membership that failed, but I've. Then I retweaked it and now I'm sort of doing it differently. So there's just so, because I'm just like. I know that, I know that it's not going to be easy, otherwise everybody would do it. Yeah, but it's a case of I wholeheartedly believe in my vision and what I'm here to do, and for me, if I, if something doesn't succeed, I tweak it and then we try again. That's definitely my motto today?
Speaker 1:how? What's the percentage of you know split between you going in and to someone's place and spending half a day there and working with their wardrobe, versus doing it virtual? Or did you gave up, after the pandemic, the virtual bit? How does it work?
Speaker 3:no, I still do virtual, but my virtuals are like Tokyo and other places like that, so it's people that physically cannot get to me. But majority or I did have a client actually in Birmingham, but yeah, again, you know, logistics of me going to Birmingham um didn't quite work out. So yeah, it just depends.
Speaker 1:But majority of my clients are face to face that makes sense and especially like because I'm the same. I I thrive in person and that's why I decided to do this podcast in person I've not yet had a single episode in on digital zoom yeah, and I refused to. I had a couple of, uh, potentially decent size, this decent influence um founders, um and I said no, it has to be in person. I'll come to you with my gear and we'll do it, but not over zoom yeah, no, I love that.
Speaker 3:But again, that's confidence in yourself and your ability to deliver an outstanding podcast, because you know what your, what your audience and what your community love to see from you. But you could have pivoted because of their stature and their influence yeah um to bend those rules, but it's about confidence within yourself that you're like no, no, no, this is how I do it, yeah.
Speaker 1:And at the end of the day, I mean a lot of thought leaders, very famous popular thought leaders, influencers, entrepreneurs, you know, do quite a lot of Zoom podcasts and interviews and so on. So it's like, why, like, oh, just because to pull on their um, on their popularity, to get my, my numbers, um up, like, then, what does what? How do I differentiate from all of the other interviews? Because, anyways, their audience if there's someone that's been doing um digital podcasts for, you know, the last two years, because they're on a kind of like a um pr tour, yeah their audience is probably at this point less likely to come and watch my podcast as well, the virtual podcast yeah you know um.
Speaker 1:So I'm like I don't see that much benefit from giving up the things that I want to do, the standards that I abide to. Yeah, your boundaries. How's your business now? How do you feel like your business has progressed from that, you know, november 2019, first official customer to today? If you were to kind of like describe it in a few, let's say, adjectives, that's very hard.
Speaker 3:That is so hard, I don't know. It's been a roller coaster so many, so many lows, but equally so many highs, and I think that if I knew everything that I know now, I don't know if I would have gone into it as quite as like, oh, I'll just do it because I want to help everyone. Definitely, naivety helped, um, but I wouldn't change it for the world.
Speaker 1:I absolutely love what I do and it does sound like you're quite a resilient individual um to get the business over the pandemic and try new things and progress the business here.
Speaker 1:You said that, knowing what you know today, you might have not started that lighthearted, in a sense, but I'm pretty sure that you would have still gone through the, the, the challenges, even if you. If you knew and it's it I think it really depends on in that moment when you realized I've gone through this life experience and I realized I came to this realization of you know who I was in the past. Yeah, it's not anymore, I'm someone new. How big of an aha moment it was, because I think that's when you know, when you, when you, this was your first business, right?
Speaker 1:yeah yeah, first, uh time entrepreneurs no offense are very naive, right um?
Speaker 3:there's no offense taken, believe me.
Speaker 1:But the thing is that as you evolve and you let's say it's your second, third, fourth business, like I'm I've had so many fails, like I'm a serial failed entrepreneur, I call myself um you you start to realize that you can see a bit the future, right, you can. You know, you mentioned, oh, if I, if I knew back then what I know now, what all the stuff, the challenge that I've been, um, you kind of preempt a bit that. And then it is this aha moment, big enough for me to take on that path. For example, I mentioned that I'm starting this film production business and, from a business perspective, I already know what to expect the challenges and hardships that I'm probably going to experience in the future. And hardships that I'm probably going to experience in the future, especially entering a service business, coming from a subscription-based model, which is, in my mind, a lot easier.
Speaker 1:But when I was a child, I wanted to be a film director. I was writing scripts, imagining me shooting and so on. It never happened, it never materialized for me. So I went down this path of, you know, building, becoming technical, being an engineer, building a software business. That allows me now to figure out if this aha, which is like I want to do this big passion of mine because, uh, like, I know that this has an impact um, had an impact in my life and I want to, kind of like, create a positive impact for others as well. Does this weigh enough to overcome all of the eye roll moments that I'm going to experience?
Speaker 1:and the answer was yes yeah but again it's you know, that's what I'm saying like yours was. You were lucky that your aha moment was big enough to keep you on that path, because when you were starting, I'm sure you had no idea what you, what was going to happen, and especially that you you're amongst the unlucky um first-time founders starting a business over the pandemic, which is even more devastating to the morale of yeah, of you as an entrepreneur absolutely, absolutely, and you're I think you're spot on there that if it wasn't for that aha moment, you know you need that momentum and the why and all of that like definitely needs to be there.
Speaker 1:And today, how is it balancing family? You said you have a daughter. Yes yeah, how is it balancing family with work?
Speaker 3:To me, the word balance when it comes to all of that needs to be put in the bin Ban it, ban it.
Speaker 3:There's no such thing. When one's up, there's got to be one's up, one's down. And I let go of the mum guilt a long time ago when I started the business, because I can't be at everything because I'm growing a business and I can't. You know, there's sometimes when I've said no to things business-wise because she really needed me for something, and but that's okay and I think that I'm really open and transparent that I've got a child. Like even on my call this morning when she was asking for my availability and I was like, do you know what summer holidays are coming up? So if you want to book in, book in sooner rather than later, because then I need to add my child care because that's, I'm a mum and I think that me trying to do it all was getting me nowhere and was feeling me with so much guilt and all of the stuff. And I just let go of that now. When one's up, one's down, and that's okay that's.
Speaker 1:I think I feel that that's a very important um lesson there, which is um, be okay, be comfortable with the fact that that you have multiple priorities, multiple responsibilities, because I think that's one of the mistakes that that um founders and I've had people on, like I've had quite a few people on the podcast that are parents and have a family, and I feel that that's one of the things that I've seen quite often as a struggle is doing the whole lot of of entrepreneurship and startup and so on and trying to juggle also family time and so on, rather than say you know well, you have to.
Speaker 1:You have to realize that you know that's happening as well in parallel and that you know. You can't compare yourself with a single bachelor entrepreneur that's in their early 20s and run running around um to hack things and make things happen, not sleeping, not having regular hours.
Speaker 3:You can't compare yourself no, absolutely, and I think that my journey as a business owner feels more aligned with my values, because I have days where it's just me and my little girl and they're gorgeous. We go to London, we do all these lovely things. But equally, she knows that if I'm going, if I'm working and I think that it's so, so important for me for her to see that that the fact that we do have those nice times, but when mommy's working, she's working.
Speaker 1:Family. We touched on that. I have a question that I asked. I ask usually founders and especially I feel that first time founders is is a question that has a lot more weight than that you're most proud of in this journey from you know 2019, up until present day today, related to your uh founder journey. Oh it's great, see, I told you that that's hard it's.
Speaker 3:It is hard because I do have a few, but I think my the thing that I'm most most proud of is the fact that I get to not only do what I love but I get to help other women in less fortunate positions. With all the charity work that I do, as fine-tuned wardrobe and for me that is so powerful and my skill set, that I can offer my skill set to those vulnerable women that are trying to get back out into work that haven't got the money to have a stylist but I get to help them facilitate you know what they wear, and the confidence and all of that through my charity work is huge, something that I'm so grateful and proud of would you still do it if?
Speaker 1:um, would you still do it for free? Let's say, let's say, let's say it's a very silly question, but I usually throw um curveballs like that. Um, let's say, you don't have to worry about survival right from a financial perspective. Yeah, would you just do it for free?
Speaker 3:100%. If money, if I was, if I was financially in a place where I could, you know, live and do all my things, I would 100% do it. Because the thing for me as well is that the reason why my business is called fine-tuned wardrobe and doesn't have my name in it is because I see it's so much bigger than me. I really want to set it up that. You know. I said to you that I go on and sell my clients clothes, but I want that to be like in a physical bricks and mortar place that these clothes go and then women from women's shelters come to that bricks and once a month to have a full-on makeover, have a try on, do all of the things and get, get out and feel amazing.
Speaker 1:So, so oh, wow, okay, so your, your.
Speaker 3:Your expanded vision is to, to, to empower with the same tools people that don't have access to you, or you know, or have the luxury of yeah, being able to talk to someone like you yes, because so many people think that having a stylist is just for celebrities and all of those things. But the thing is that so many women need this. So many women need to feel amazing in order to then go out and be part of the community and, you know, go for those roles that they might not have gone for. And I think that if I can facilitate something that helps women feel like that, whilst you know, growing the business and growing the brand like that would just like that is the dream.
Speaker 1:I feel, I think that that's a great idea and honestly, I I never said that on the podcast to anyone saying well, you know, people talk a bit more broad and metaphorical around their future and so on.
Speaker 3:Oh no, I've got a very, very clear plan. For some reason, that doesn't surprise me.
Speaker 1:For some reason, that doesn't surprise me, but I feel that that's such a great idea because not only you take that wardrobe, those items from customers that don't have the access to, you can come in and have a portion of what your customers have, which is get them to feel good of who they are, while also getting some free stuff.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and feel like they're worthy enough. Yeah, exactly, feel like they're worthy enough to have this treatment, just like any other woman. And I think that, after working with the charity that I work for and seeing the transformation that happens when a woman's given this in oh my god, it's brought me to tears. It is absolutely profound and I think that, from the charity's point of view, it has to come through a different. It has to come through lots and lots of winding roads and, you know, lots of tick boxes where I want this to be able to be accessible for all women. You don't just have to be going to go to get a job. You know you could have come from an abusive relationship and you're just trying to find yourself again. It could be anything. That's the women I want to help yeah, true charity.
Speaker 1:I suppose charity with this kind of stuff it has a lot of rules and stuff. So basically the stuff that you hand over to charities from um, from your customers, have a very um narrow segment of where they land because you know um you have to be in a certain boxes?
Speaker 3:Yeah, no and they've got to be like interview, appropriate clothes that go there and all of that. But it could just be like Jane just wants to feel good in her clothes because she doesn't have any, because she was, you know, she had to flee her home, you know that kind of thing, what else?
Speaker 1:It seems like you have some few ideas, ideas you said you have everything plotted um. You don't have to give or give all of your plans away.
Speaker 3:I don't want you to feel uncomfortable I've said too much on that podcast no, I um no, I've just got really, really big plans, because for me I'd love to see fine-tuned wardrobe all over, so I want it to be. I want to be lots of me's around, because at the moment it's me and my assistant that do this, but I would I see it much bigger than just me definitely so there will be more stylists, more, more, more people in your team yeah eventually, definitely, and what do you?
Speaker 1:what do you see that needed in order for that to be achieved? What, what would make you make that a reality as in? Is it financial? Is it? What is it exactly I?
Speaker 3:think it's definitely financial for sure and growing the brand more. But I think that with all of that, it's exposure and all of that good stuff. So that's why I do a lot of talks, I'm everywhere, which I think you just got to be. No one's going to know about you in your office at home, so you've got to put yourself out there and I wholeheartedly believe in what I do and I know it's going to be a success. It's just going to take maybe a bit more finances for sure it does sound.
Speaker 1:It does sound like that, and I'm always excited when, when I have people that are have a you know, bigger mission and want to make, make it happen, and I'm also very half happy that, oh, with all of the ups and downs specifically the downs yeah, um, you kept on your path and you still have that vision and you continue to do to do so because, as I mentioned I'm reiterating at this point you know, being a first-time founder, not having any business minded individuals around you like parents, family and so on, um, all of my family said that what the heck am I doing?
Speaker 3:they thought it was a terrible idea. Literally they were like no one's gonna buy that. Why are you doing that? Get a job yeah, I feel that family is the biggest, biggest critique and oh, my word sometimes they make sense and you should listen sometimes yeah, yeah, I think if I listened it wouldn't have.
Speaker 1:It would have been an idea and that would have been it, yeah that, uh, you know, not having the the tools necessary to to start something, and then a whole pandemic in between, um, so, yeah, that's honestly that's very impressive just from that perspective. You know, leaving aside achievements and you know your brand growing and so on, um, and you kind of like taking this role of being public, being a more public person and doing pr and so on, but just still going at it since 2019, with all of these obstacles, as a first-time founder. You're the type of example that people I want people to look at.
Speaker 1:My segment I don't know if I mentioned this, but my segment of of audience is aspiring, uh, founders and entrepreneurs, young entrepreneurs, people that are their first business or they tried a couple of things and failed and decided that it might not be for them yeah I want to encourage people that are very early on and are intimidated by this world of of business and, honestly, is these kind of examples and stories that, um, that I'm quite excited about because you know it's like well, you, may you manage to overcome a bunch of things, um, hard stuff, like why others shouldn't? Um, I usually end with three questions, flash questions, and you know them because I even iterate them on the call okay um, so quote that you live by.
Speaker 1:I know I've been told off by a couple of um guests that live by. I don't live by any quote.
Speaker 3:Okay, quote that you live by or quote that you just find yourself um using so I laughed when you, when I was thinking about this, because I do, um a word of the year. So every year I have a word that I live by for that year. Last year it was growth and it definitely played a massive part within my business. There were so many growth moments last year and this year is trust and believe, and that is my, it's my mantra, it's what I go by, it's what I go by, and I think that for me, having a word of the year rather than a quote is better, because you're gonna live it for that year wholeheartedly, rather than a quote sometimes can get a little bit diluted. Exactly, yeah, um, so for me it's trust and believe that, whatever it is, it's just as it should be, or just as it's trust and belief yeah, that's also quite strong yeah it's like I've recently.
Speaker 1:I've. I was talking to one of my team members, um, and we came up with a, with a not quote with a, with a statement that I said I'm going to trademark, which is.
Speaker 3:Should you be giving it away now though?
Speaker 1:Well, I've already posted on social media.
Speaker 3:Oh, okay.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I forgot it. What the hell? Oh, okay, right, ignore that I'm going to cut this segment out of here um oh, yes, yes, I remember preach, pitch and pray.
Speaker 3:Nice as in, pray as in yes, not pray, as in yeah, that would have a completely different connotation.
Speaker 1:Um, oh, nice nice yeah, as in, like you know, preach about the, the stuff that you know you believe in and matter um pitch, pitch yourself and then pray that it will work out trust and believe absolutely exactly no, I love that.
Speaker 3:I love that. So when am I going to see it on a t-shirt? I'm going to sit on a banner somewhere I've already made quite a few t-shirts have you yeah, I have.
Speaker 1:I'll send you a link. I have a shop with um t-shirts for um phrases for founders. The one that I like the most is when life gives you lemons, pivot nice, everyone's like. Make lemonade, no pivot um.
Speaker 3:That's brilliant right book that um influenced your life definitely rich dad, poor dad. Definitely it was a game changer for me when did you read that?
Speaker 1:oh was it after uh, after you had your daughter?
Speaker 3:um, no, it was way before, but it didn't really make an impact when I first read it. Then I did read it after my daughter. The first time it was a bit like, oh, this is good. And then I was like when I had her then it was like, oh, because I really do believe. After having my daughter I almost it was like a rebirth. I know that sounds really like. It was like, oh my gosh, like yeah, I get, I get it, I get. This life thing now. Um, yeah, it was phenomenal for me in terms of there's just so many things that I thought I knew but I didn't know, and I grew up from a family where we just made ends meet, you know, we just got on with it. But it was the way that the story unraveled and unpicked. It was just, yeah, it was life-changing. I was like okay, and I think that that definitely had an impact on how I then saw, like like the start in the business, definitely.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Have you read it?
Speaker 1:No, I haven't. I felt that I, you know, didn't relate to it at that point, but and like you, I might read it now and think you know, yeah, you know yeah um, I don't know, about the the kids situation.
Speaker 1:But you know, if I ever, I might read it afterwards and it might make sense. No, but there's a lot of like I know. I know a lot of people that read it, so I interrupt you. Um that read it that don't have kids, they don't even have partners, and they're like, oh, there's, there's, there's really good in there. I probably should read it yeah, no, and it's I.
Speaker 3:I don't think that it's necessarily, and that's probably why it didn't hit when I before I had her um, also that I was just not in that headspace. But then I think that when I was like looking into getting more into life, as it were, as an adult after having her, I was like oh, oh yeah, okay, money, oh, wow, okay. I just thought things differently for sure yeah I probably should read it.
Speaker 1:I've been reading a lot of um books around, um, like the philosophy of of good business, business structure, um good entrepreneurs, um the startups and so on, um. And then, speaking of good um, very poor segue, but a good habit that you advocate for smooth, smooth, I like it.
Speaker 3:I like it. Um, so a good habit for me, oh my gosh. And I think that it literally saved me. It's exercise, I live by it, because it literally is not only good for your physical, it's my mental. That's why I do it. There's something about just doing moving my body that just if, on the days when I don't do it, I can feel a difference within me. Oh yeah for sure. And I think that if you can do something, that's gonna impact how you feel, whether it's what you wear, and then you top it on with the cherry on the top of moving your body. I just think that that's what they should give out as prescriptions.
Speaker 3:A gym membership yeah um, rather than pills, but that's a whole nother podcast, I'm sure.
Speaker 1:Yeah, definitely no, but I I deeply agree and I realize, and the one, the one thing that I tell people is speaking of, um, you know, uh, changing the way you feel, feeling better, um, having more energy, being more happy, being less foggy in how you think, and so on in your thinking. I list all of these usually and tell people would you not invest an hour per day, or even 30 minutes per day, to have all of that? For me, as I'm at the stage where I'm training as well, I've had a period of maybe three months where I wasn't training much recently. I've I've started in the last few weeks to to go back properly to the gym. Um, and I I already know, I know cause I feel rubbish.
Speaker 3:I'm always like when I haven't been for a couple of years.
Speaker 1:Yeah that like like my, my body feels like I'm slouching, I don't feel strong, I don't feel tall, I don't feel confident and my morning start very rough. But I'm also at a stage where I've been training for like six, seven years now and I and I know that all of that pain and misery like people call it of of the session, of the training sessions, it's just at the beginning for a week and then, and and then I'm just, it just becomes yeah, absolutely second nature, absolutely.
Speaker 1:So I'm like okay, but I completely agree and and I've, I've a lot of people said that as the habit- yeah. I think maybe 70 percent. I've had almost really 50 um a guest founder so far and probably 70 percent said exercise. So that's a state um statement of sorry, of how true, this is.
Speaker 3:It is so, so important. Also, if you've had that many people say it, but my caveat is getting up early and all those people that say I don't have time, if you get up up early, you can make time to make that happen. Um, and I always think that having um habit stacking is huge.
Speaker 1:So if you, you get up early, you do something, and then you exercise, you go for a run, you do something, it makes it much more achievable oh, 100, and this is one of the things that, like, I take, you know, vitamins, supplements, um, even like at this point, collagen and and a lot of stuff. If I don't go to the gym, I don't take those. I feel that I, I like, I, I stack this where I wake up, go, do all of my mixes, do all of my vitamins and supplements and so on, and then out the door in the gym and that's my schedule.
Speaker 3:Absolutely. And also, if you're not looking after yourself physically, how on earth are you going to dress that body in the way that you want? Or how on earth are you going to do all of these other things? I think that it's got to start from a place of what do I? You've got to feed the inside as well as the outside.
Speaker 1:Do you find yourself giving that advice quite often to your customers?
Speaker 3:Totally, totally. I always say that I'm not just a stylist, I'm also a therapist and a coach, because it's so much bigger than just us. I had a client that was you know, she wasn't getting in her workouts, she was in a rut and all of those things. But really we just changed, we just done her a little timetable and when she does stuff and she's now like following it to a tee, it feels amazing, her clothes feel better, it's just like it's a win-win. And I know that fitness helped me massively in my darkest, darkest days. And even like when something's not going right within the business, I'm going to go and run it off. I'm going to go and run it off, come back with a clearer mind and then we'll start again.
Speaker 1:And I think that's where the resilience comes from, because I know where to put that energy yeah, and because you, you know you train and you exercise and so on, you're a lot more in a better position to um kind of energize your customers mindset around it absolutely, because I'm I'm practicing what I'm preaching yeah I'm not sitting there not doing um, it's even like things, like you know, trying to educate my clients through what they buy and things.
Speaker 3:I haven't bought anything from a real shop in over five years. Every single thing really that I'm wearing today has been upcycled or it's from charity shop. Yeah, because I I want to show you that it's possible.
Speaker 1:You can look like this without having an impact on the planet yeah, I mean, you have to live your own words and advice, isn't it?
Speaker 3:That's the only way to by your value.
Speaker 1:Exactly Right. I do have one last question, a very stupid and silly question. You talked about growing up, the neighborhood where you're living with your family. You're the only black family in that neighborhood. Is that still the case for that neighborhood or things have changed okay?
Speaker 2:there's more of us, it's fine and half of my family don't even live there anymore.
Speaker 3:Now it's only me and one of my sisters.
Speaker 1:But no, it's definitely definitely changed I mean the, at least, I mean the country in general, I wouldn't say a specific area, but I think, um, things have changed quite significantly. I feel that we've went back a few steps with the brexit and absolutely, absolutely.
Speaker 3:And there's still, there is still some villages and towns within where I live that are very predominantly white based. Yeah for sure, for sure. But for me, I just think that it's all about education and just seeing everybody as a human being and being kind just seeing everybody as a human being and being kind, uh, um.
Speaker 1:I mean, I have a question, this um for you as well, because we're talking about education and such. We do live in in a world, in an era where you know, everyone has, you know, these things in their pockets their phones um access to to the internet and so on.
Speaker 1:Um, do you reckon that helps in, let's say, in some of these areas where you know it's still pretty, you know predominantly white and so on, because you know we were you're talking about. In your childhood you went to school and you've been called names because kids there had no idea.
Speaker 3:Is it an alien? No, no, it's a human.
Speaker 1:Maybe never seen a person of color in person and so on. But I'm hopeful that today at least, when we have access to the internet and the information is so, um, flowing so easily and so on, that, um, even in, let's say, more remote villages and so on, that is not such a weird thing to be amongst or to have people amongst you that don't look like you yeah, see.
Speaker 3:So my thing is is that, um, it's all good and well seeing people on media or whatever, but I think it's about having those interactions with people in person very true, yeah and getting more people that look like me, that look like you, that look like everybody else to be in those communities, whether it's going to do talks or whatever and I do my talks everywhere and I think that it's, and I really want to start doing them more in schools and things like that, just so children know that people like me do things like this or vice versa, because I just think that that's the generation that we need to.
Speaker 1:We need to educate, whether it's sustainability, whether it's empowerment, but or just just for them to see people like me that are out there as well and not just on tv or as celebrities yeah, and it's, and it's about the impact, right because, if you go go and going and speaking at a school and talking about how girls and women go through these kind of like periods of changing identity and in themselves and their wardrobes and so on, that's a very impactful mission that you're on and and, in general, making people um as young as possible. Understanding that anyone can have an impact in the world is very important, so I think you carry that yeah message and that weight on your shoulders as well.
Speaker 3:Yeah no, and it's funny actually. I was speaking to somebody the other day and I said that, whether you like it or not, whether you're just Jane from next door or whoever, sandra, at the school playground, there's some you're an influence to somebody. Yeah, whether you like it or not, and I think that being educated in things that um matter to you or that for the greater good, is so, so important, because you, we know what, what we want to see in the world, whether it's, you know, seeing more people like us, or whatever it is. I think that it's really important to know that you are of value and there's somebody looking up at you very wise and empowering words.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much for this entire conversation. Thank you for so much for also giving me, in a sense, a platform to talk about my fashion desires and thoughts and so on. It's the first time I'm actually talking about clothing on my podcast oh, I love it as so in-depth as we had today. So thank you so much for for joining me.
Speaker 3:No, thank you so much for having me. I've loved it.
